Yesterday was a date night with a man I've been seeing for about a year and a half. Although I don't consider us together in a boyfriend/girlfriend sense anymore, I do still have feelings for him. We've been trying to make our relationship work out and strengthen it.
When I first met him he was great! There were no worries. After we became an official couple, however, I started noticing some changes in attitude. He's stubborn, selfish, and prideful. Nothing that I can't handle mind you. I can be those things as well at times.
The reason I sort of called it off and suggested that we start over anew was because I started to feel a little cheated. He would flirt with other girls online, tell me I needed to hit the gym more often, and wouldn't tell anyone about us, family, friends, or his internet girls. I understood why he didn't tell his family about us.
He's a Muslim and being with me would cause a lot of ruckus. His parents, whom I have never met, don't like me. It has nothing to do with my religion since that was never mentioned to them but everything to do with me being a white American woman. Of course, none of that bothered me considering he's not the kind of man I would marry anyway. I'm too young to even think about marriage at this point in my life.
What upset me the most is that he felt like he had to hide our relationship from complete strangers who also happened to be white American girls. Plus there was that time that he skipped out on my Father's wedding and that hit a whole different level of resentment.
Anyway, last night he came over to have an Italian meal with me which was supposed to consist of stuffed mushrooms, basil-tomato grilled cheese, and broccoli cheese tortellini. However, he was talking to me about my religion at the time and I burned the stuffed mushrooms because I forgot they were in the oven.
He came into the kitchen saying he wanted to talk to me about something. I thought since we were having a romantic dinner he would tell me how beautiful I was, how much he loved me, something other than what he actually wanted to talk about.
Basically, (and I'm para-phrasing here) he said that he didn't like my religion because I worship both a God and a Goddess and that was a huge sin because there's only one God. He said he wanted me to try Christianity instead.
...
I was taken aback! I thought he had accepted me for who I am!
I didn't say anything for a long time because I didn't know how to respond. Thinking that I could maybe compromise I told him about some Dianic Sects of Wicca which believe in just a Goddess and not a God. That's one God right?
When I told him about that he was like I don't know. It needs to be a God. I just said a Goddess is a God, just the female version. Then he was like I don't think that counts; they always say God. So apparently "God" has to be a male in any scenario which I just don't agree with.
I should just start saying I worship a higher power or "It". Then It can be either/or.
Or a hermaphrodite.
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